what c.s. lewis and I think about beauty.

I've been thinking a lot about beauty.  It's one of my favorite topics because I'm in awe of how God's way of how we should live causes our lives to look incredibly beautiful.  His "rules" and do's and do not's give our lives a shine and glow that making choices based on the world's values does not.  We are kept free from a lot of filth and a lot of heartache.

C.S. Lewis talks about how we can look into the past to try to find beauty and good feelings and good times.  We disguise our longings by calling it reminiscing or being nostalgic.  He says if we constantly look into the past at "the good old days" our hearts are going to be continuously broken by what we don't find.  He states that God uses situations and people in our lives to shine his beauty through, but that it is not contained in those moments.  If we are constantly staring into the past to feel how we once felt, we will find empty shells of what God used at the time to enrich our lives.

This encouraged me so much to look at what God is using every single day, in our very present present, to shine his beauty and incredibleness into our lives.  Beauty and everything good and perfect is contained in God. Everything else is just a vessel created to show it off.  There's nothing wrong with looking at what God has done in the past and thanking him for the good that happened, but when it prevents you from seeing the goodness in the day in front of you, it's reflecting in a way that sucks a bit of joy out of our lives. We don't have to think the good days have come and gone, or on the flip side, that the good is yet to come.  God is not boxed into time frames and certain moments of our lives.  He flows continuously through our lives, moment by moment as it's happening to us.  We can be encouraged knowing that God is working today to make our lives more incredible.

Disclaimer:  there may be some theological flaws in those statement, but I felt I could safely put this out there as a musing :)

evan b.

evan murray buckpitt makes good music. and you should listen to it here.

candle wax

Wax drips down from candles lit in Cathedrals around the Philippines.

time traveller.

i am in the philippines right now. i am staying in the house my mother grew up in. my shower is a bucket of water (drawn from a well just outside). my bed is usually a straw mat on the wooden floors, but luckily my mom posted an air mattress. my day to day activities include riding a boat out to the fish cages, swimming, riding motorbikes through the jungle, and spending time with my cousins. i am blessed to have family here. and to be part of this simple way of life.

What Seems Trivial?

The weather has turned quite chilly and I have washed my jeans then placed then into the dryer to shrink them back to perfect fitting size. I’m spending some time with my mum this afternoon before going to work a little later tonight.
Aside form all this, university is on my mind and decisions for my own life are looming before me. I can’t quite see the top, only the small stairs that begin here at the bottom to get me up there. I’m a little distressed at this whole situation and I would like to have better vision of what exactly is ahead of me. One thing is for sure, I have a great life and opportunities are coming my way and it’s all too easy for me to get caught up in it all and forget the things that are happening all over the world that are not necessarily affecting me but I should probably let them.
Over the past week I have been thinking about the fact that I do not really watch the news. In the house that I live in right now I haven’t bothered to set up an aerial in my room and so I never catch anything of what is going on. So I challenged myself to make an effort. All of the best news publications are all online and there is actually no excuse for my ignorance.
A few days ago I realized how much exactly I am missing out on by keeping myself in the dark. It can sometimes be so difficult for us as individuals to deal with the things that are happening in the world because we think that there is nothing that we can do about it. I admit that I struggle with this. Being so young and having virtually no money, in the middle of studying. It does not seem like there is much that I can do for the people in Uganda who are getting turned away from AIDS clinics because they do not have the capacity to treat anymore patients, and I do not have the opportunity to provide comfort for those Chinese families who have lost their children in violent attacks in schools there.
These tragedies are confronting for us in our comfortable lives and sometimes is it true that there is not a great deal physically that we can do. Sometimes we just think that having a great deal of money would solve all these things, but that may not be the case.
In 2003, a small group of guys from Southern California ventured to Africa in attempt to document stories and to close the gap on their ignorance. Now, almost seven years later their film has been seen by millions and they are a part of our generation, and have created invisiblechildren.com. They tell stories and seek justice for those who have been forgotten by the Western world. They help us to see that each and every one of those Ugandan children who have been stolen from their homes, have just as much value and worth as our own children. They have been able to do this just through their passion of story telling, even though these are hard stories to share. 
So there is more solutions than just throwing money at situations. There are stories to find and share, and each individual on this planet has their own story, that is unique and of just as much value as your own. I, personally have to actively pursue this, to care for individuals around me and choose to look beyond my own life, my own decision making and to remember those who are in so much need. 

Earth Scabs.

 

this is a picture of the trail i was just just about to walk, its all volcanic rock which felt like and sounded like glass to walk over, you may not be able to see but there are sulphur clouds coming up out of the ground far far into the picture, the mount on the left is the lava spout which erupted in 1969. anyways i was pretty impressed with nature that day, and i highly considered becoming a geologist.

Get to know beauty, it wants to tell you something.

Fairbanks, Alaska.

Trying to creatively write this last two weeks has been like trying to force a bird to swim…. Nothing natural about it.
I thought I would be overflowing with ideas and observations, when in actuality my mind has been….. empty.
Whether it is the jet lag or the transition into a new season, I have not caught a thought thats expanded this heart and caused my fingers to run furiously over this key board.
Not without trying though.

I’m in a place made famous for its beauty, surrounded by at least 11 different cultures everyday and my brother just got a smiley face tattoo on his big toe. I have observed plenty and processed much, but never been compelled to express. Its unlike me. I usually type my thoughts out, but I lay here now pen in hand with paper catching thoughts hoping that the return to the good old way of writing will help.

But as I consider my frustration, I am led to believe that the reason my creative writing well had been dry is that lately I have been refreshing myself from the well of knowledge. I’m currently in school and this is the first week of the quarter. I believe I have read more and learnt more this week than I have in the last 2 months. I’m hungry to learn and my favourite topics are at hand: humanity and science.

One of my favourite writers C.S Lewis comments that “the tasks of the modern educator is not to cut down trees but to irrigate deserts”. Yehp. I feel like everything I have ever produced before now has been grown in the desert, but with this current “irrigation” of knowledge replenishing my world, I feel my next fruits will be far sweeter, rich and filling.

It's as though I’ve been able admire a butterfly for its beauty and grace but attained knowledge has led me to understand that this certain butterfly travels over thousands of miles to hibernate for 4 months in the frost only to awake, start to fly back from where it came, reproduce somewhere on the way back, and actually never make it home cause it dies. But yet the next generation repeats the .This knowledge has given beauty layers, depth and dimension.

Same again seeing the poverty striken parts of Africa on the tv. Although not sightly beautiful...the beauty of empathy and emotion reveal the injustice in to my heart and I am bummed right!?  However the knowledge gives insight that 20% of western societies consume 86% of the worlds good. (Now im just ticked off !). Knowledge has revealed to me just how unnecessary their suffering is, how $1 a day $30 a month really is nothing compared to what I have around me. its given my empathy and emotion validity and more understanding of what it is I am actually recognizing as unjust.

How much more deliberate is love when you have knowledge and understanding?

How much more easier it is to appreciate the world around us with knowledge and understanding?

I believe the deliberate pursuit of knowledge, wisdom, and understanding is like adding lenses to your sight. You'll be able to experience a more expressive, rich, and full life; not missing depth, detail, or purpose.

There is always more to know and it's more often than not worth finding out.

See life as a incomprehensible mastepiece and its desperate to show you more.

His favour.

Taken on an iphone in Kaiua bay Kona, Hawaii.

Op-Shop Shopping: To Wash or Not?

Today while thrift store shopping, I was faced again with a question that comes up every time I get something 'new' from an op-shop.  To wash or not?  And by washing I don't mean ever, I mean before you give it its first wear.  This question is clear cut to most people.  OF COURSE  you wash it!  There are some disgusting people out there!  You could get AIDS.  To others, it's just as obvious.  The op-shop probably does something to make it sanitary.  It can't be that dirty.  I'll wash it eventually but right now, I have somewhere to go and this looks great on me.  

I'm a little ashamed to say that for me, I walk the middle line.  I wish I was clear cut about this.  I wish I could tell you that every time I buy second hand, I don't put it near my body unless it has had a good, hot round in the washing machine.  But I don't.  It's really all circumstancial.  If I happen to do a load of laundry before I wear the new addition to my wardrobe, it gets washed.  If I have somewhere I want to wear it to and don't have laundry planned in-between, I go for it.  Gross? Maybe, but I can think of worse things. 

I guess in this area of my life I have high standards when I have the time. 

What about you?

(As much as I try to not take others photography, this is from Frankie magazine)

The Smell Of Basil

Zoe just cooked the perfect batch of pancakes and now I’m sitting in my room breathing in the fresh basil that sits in a jar on my bookshelf. Days off from our normal jobs can be so liberating for your heart. You could spend all day in your crusty pajamas or you could look at your freedom as an adventure to be created. Sometimes the simple surroundings of your home town can bring the new perspectives that you have needed for some time.

After coming home from overseas I’ve spent the last few weeks really making a conscious effort to make the most of my free time and to look for the possibilities of each day. I don’t think that God really intended us to be so busy that we missed out on the beautiful things around us, He wanted His flowers to be smelt and wondered at and the ocean to roar in our ears. So with these things on my mind I ventured outdoors and took a bus.

Living by the sea is an amazing privilege and fortunately for me my town is full of creative people. As you walk down the main street, close to the art school the alleyways are covered in art. Though the majority can sometimes be very average and it can all seem like a mess, but then you find a small idea to be cherished, a tiny stencil of Batman and Robin scaling the window of a run down shop front. Someone had put that there for it to be found, not necessarily in plain sight. The little characters make you smile at the idea of super heroes and their representation of good overcoming evil in the regular city streets.

Sometimes you need to sit on your own with a good soy chai warming your insides to appreciate your own thoughts and the ideas of your heart. As I sat sipping my drink at a café the other day, a man walked by under the window I was sitting at with a box full of fresh basil. The smell overcame me, therefore leading to my new pleasure of leaving basil in my bedroom with the hope of making vego pasta with it later this week. The oil tankers on the horizon seem strangely romantic and normally I would never notice these things because I am rarely on my own.

Simple things can always relieve the complicated things of our days, and there is always greatness reflected in the scenery around us. We should really be taking more days off, and it does not mean you’re being lazy. What new things can be created to leave your mark in a public place? Beauty is created to be given away and then you need to seek it out again.

Do not worry.

courtesy of Miss Kayla Norris

portobella

i am a sucker for mushrooms. and ricotta cheese. 

got this deliciousness from 'Snow',

the cafe/bakery that christina used to work at!

dusk last night

Last night we went on a picnic to farewell our friend Wing. This is what the sky looked like at dusk.

To much love to be a review: The Avett Brothers

 not sure who took this photo but it's from a random internet search.  Good job You.

So I had in mind to write a review. To tell you all about what it was like to see the Avett Brothers live.

However, that kind of seems lame! I don’t even read reviews!  I do like stories though, and so I am going to tell you a story and its not going to be about the show. It will be all about the music of the Avett brothers and how I’m in to it.

Sitting somber desperate to fill my ears and soul with something distracting, I skimmed through all folders on his ipod. I finally hit playlists.

“Songs for me and my girlie.”

My heart hit the back of my rib my cage.

Song 1: Swept Me Away (sentimental version) – The Avett Brothers.

What followed was a bunch of instrumental jazz music, some Etta James…. and, actually just a lot of jazz music and songs from the 60s. Hmm.

Although I had listened to the Avett Brothers numerous times before, from this time on I heard their music in a whole different way (Ever feel like your life has a soundtrack!?). Their songs would be the markers for so many events in my life, with their lyrics often causing me to consider many things of the heart.

Left on Laura Left on Lisa - Four Thieves Gone.  After seeing it performed, just banjo and voice, always reminds me of Alaska

Living of Love – Introducing Emotionalism. I would listen to it whenever I felt like bitterness would begin to creep into my heart.

Gift for Melody Anne – Mignonette. Helped me to not make some real dumb arse decisions.

And now. Weight of Lies, another from the album Introducing Emotionalism. It's helping me realize I cannot run away, it never works.

These are not even my favourite songs these are just the songs that have seared my heart. For me, The Avett Brothers are stories and soul. I will risk it and say I feel their lyrics are true. They are not just words artistically placed in verse and chorus to sound cool. They are words that have been lived. That’s how I like my music. A story, an insight, something to take me away.

Listen to this band. I would suggest to start with The Gleam, Second Gleam and Carolina Jubilee. I feel you get a good mix if you were to start with these three. However Introducing Emotionalism and Mignonette are super popular, as will be their latest, I and Love and You.

My favourite is Four Thieves Gone.

The end!

Oh, in regards to the show, the cello player.. in the words of my friend Emily, 

 “Gods gift to the cello?!?”

See them when they come to your town.

Homeless And On The Wrong Side Of The Border

It’s a perfect rainy day in my hometown of Newcastle, Australia, and Joel is on my mind…

He lives in downtown Tijuana, Mexico right near the San Diego border. We were two people from two entirely different worlds, but somehow he still trusted me with what he had to say. He had a lifetime of experience and my life at twenty-four had only just begun.

His home was nothing more than scrap wood and some tarp to protect against the cold bitter winter rain, which had turned most of the streets to small rivers. He came out to greet me and helped me pick up rubbish around the square at Zona Notre. We took our opportunity to give him some soup and he began to tell us about his life.

Prison for seventeen years had consumed the majority of his life. Even through problems with drugs and being in and out of prison he had still managed to fall in love, marry and have children. His wife and children remain in the United States now.

He spent most of his life in the States and after being released from prison he was deported to Mexico. He struggles as he can not speak much Spanish. He explains to me that on this particular day there are not as many people around because the policia had been by and taken many people in. There at the square, in the middle on Tijuana, people normally come from all over for hot soup and it was so unusual to see so few people. Everything seems so grey in the rain, even Joel’s jacket, a dull navy reflects the day. Today, Joel had money from his wife to pay off the police, not everyone in the square is that lucky. The police have the power to plant drugs on you if you can not give them reason enough to leave you alone.

He rubs his balding head, his face twitches as he continues to share about life after prison. His moustache is one most boys would dream of. Now, being on the street, he shares with me that he is happy to be outdoors. Being institutionalized for such a long time had left him desperate for free air and open spaces. He clings to his new found freedom and free will. Still he struggles with drugs, they tie him to the street.

His appearance touches my heart, his frankness and vulnerability to share with strangers speaks to my spirit. I wish I could be this unashamed and honest about the things I struggle with day to day. To be available to share life experience with people has more value than we care to realize. Think about Joel, then think about his situation, and then think about your own. 

Take a look through my window